More Flying Research

I went to the beach today to do more research on my, at this time futile, attempts of learning to fly and more importantly denounce the Law of Gravity. Anyhoo, I went cliff diving where I learned, quickly, that there is still mountains of information I have to deciminate before actually flying by myself... but, I'm really good at falling right now. In my favor though, there was a pretty big ocean to break my fall and shove massive amounts of sea water into my nose where it decided to find a home in my nasal cavity.

The big freakin' rock I jumped off of was a lot smaller than I thought and transversly a lot farther down while I looked over the edge. It was about thirty feet or so and jumping into about 10-12 feet of water depending on the tide. My first jump was all about falling and splashing into the water, whereas my second jump was strickly for testing purposes. I have found in my research, though I concentrated heavily on flying on that second jump, I fell just as fast each time.

I will not, dear reader, let this obstacle stand in my way by any means! I know this research won't be easy nor will I ever find a way to side-step the very laws that Newton laid down. Fuck him and his apple.

Which leads me to an observation: If Newton lived in Hawai'i when he discovered his little idea of gravity and all it's stupid laws, he would of been under a cocconut tree and not one containing apples. So, instead of getting hit in the head with an apple and discovering the laws of gravity... he would of just been knocked the fuck out.